Bruise
by lunaanna
Summary: The first thing Bellamy looked at when he woke up was Clarke. She was already sitting up, and pain seared through him when he saw the raw, red marks that marred her neck. Nausea hit quickly, and he sat up as well, and finally felt the pain of the stab wound to his leg. It didn't seem to be deep, but it stung badly, and the pain reminded him of a stab he had received a long, long ti


Bruise

The first thing Bellamy looked at when he woke up was Clarke. She was already sitting up, and pain seared through him when he saw the raw, red marks that marred her neck. Nausea hit quickly, and he sat up as well, and finally felt the pain of the stab wound to his leg. It didn't seem to be deep, but it stung badly, and the pain reminded him of a stab he had received a long, long time ago. The difference was, he was stabbed trying to save Clarke. This time, he had been trying to kill her.

There wasn't time to dwell, as the colony showed up soon after. The action was good for him, and the bite of the needle as Abby stitched him up was too. He didn't try talking to Clarke; couldn't stand looking at her. There was no question who would go when Russel asked for volunteers. Clearly, the man was smart – he knew Clarke was indispensable.

When Clarke pulled Bellamy aside, he knew her concern. He immediately promised Clarke he would get Maddie home for her, just like he had promised so many things in the past. It was relief that washed over him that she seemed to still have faith in him.

Echo tried to talk during the walk, but he was distracted by the events of the eclipse and Octavia's presence. Her animosity and violence was a reminder of all the dark parts of him that he had tried so hard to repress. Clearly, he wasn't doing a good job. They were just below the surface.

With every step he took, Bellamy focused on the wound in his leg.

When he shut the door on Octavia, he could barely believe he had actually done it. He felt his heart twinge with guilt. Obviously, she was capable of handling herself, but was he abandoning her simply in an effort to assuage himself of all the bitterness he was holding?

At least he was able to keep his promise. Maddie ran to Clarke, and for a moment Bellamy forgot the actions of the last day. That was, until Diyoza was quickly expelled from the dome. Things became tense, but the people kept their word. Everyone was given temporary quarters until it was decided where they could settle permanently. Bellamy and Echo were put in the row of rooms that were small but comfortable. They were all there, except for Clarke, Abby, and Maddie. Clarke was given a vacant apartment due to her being declared the leader of the group. She tried to turn it down, but it seemed like she was too exhausted to argue, even though Raven scoffed loudly as she slammed the door to her tiny room.

Bellamy was tired too, enough so that he thought he would have fallen asleep immediately. Instead, he tossed and turned next to Echo in a bed that was more comfortable than they had experienced in a very long time. Carefully, so as not to wake his companion, he got out of bed, slid on his boots, and stepped out onto the landing that overlooked the centre of the settlement. Bellamy stepped forward, and gripping the railing, spotted a lone figure sitting by the fountain that Murphy had almost died in. He thought for a moment that he would always be able to recognize her, no matter the time or place.

Bellamy didn't think he made a noise, but Clarke looked up anyways. He saw her lips tug in a half-smile, and she raised her hand in greeting. Apparently she didn't expect him to join her, because she turned back to stare into the softly rippling water.

She must have heard his heavy boots coming down the stairs, but she didn't stir as he sat next to her. "Couldn't sleep?" he asked, trying to put a jovial tone on, but not quite succeeding.

"Every time I close my eyes, I'm right back here. During the eclipse."

Bellamy shuts his eyes, unable to bear the sight of her eyes swimming with tears she was trying her hardest to not let fall. "Clarke," he started softly, but was cut off by her shaky voice.

"I almost slit my own throat, Bellamy," she whispered, and his eyes shot open with horror. "I heard my mother, telling me that I'm toxic, a cancer, and the only way to save all of you would be for me to just… _cut it out_." The tears fell, leaving tracks down her cheeks, and Bellamy fought the urge to wipe them away. "And it's true. When Russel found out everything I've done, he wasn't going to let us stay. The only reason he's let us is that he saw my blood."

"You're not toxic, Clarke. Not at all." Bellamy said, voice quavering, reaching out finally and grabbing her hand. She was quite the opposite, really, but he didn't know how to say that.

She didn't seem to register what he said, however, continuing. "Really, what good am I? Raven, Murphy – they can't forgive me. They see me for what I truly am."

"They'll forgive you, Clarke. I swear they will. They're just looking for someone to be mad at right now."

"And of course, it's me. The outsider. You are all your own family now that you've spent those years on the Ark. You said it yourself. You don't need me anymore." The tears began to fall in earnest.

Bellamy stood and knelt in front of her, clasping both hands in his. "I didn't mean that, Clarke, not at all." A soft sob escaped her, and he bent his head until he was able to meet her eyes. "I spent 6 years in space getting by without you, because I had to. I needed you then, and I need you now. We all do. We've just spent so long – I've spent so long without you that I learned how to use my head."

"That's not true. I see you, the way you act, how you lead. You're the leader you were always meant to be. You were only able to be that when I wasn't with you. I always needed to take charge, and I made bad decisions."

Bellamy let out a shuddering breath. "So, I've changed. You have, too. We're both better people now, Clarke. And even if you don't believe that I need you, you must know that I _want_ you. I don't want to do this without you. I never did."

Clarke reached up and wiped the dampness from his cheek slowly. Without hesitating, Bellamy pulled her up into a tight embrace, threading his hand into her hair and clutching her back tightly with the other. He felt his shirt dampen when her face buried itself into his neck. "I'm so, so sorry that I hurt you, Clarke. For what I said, and - and what I did. I swear to you I'll never harm you again." He felt her nod against him, and they stayed in their silent embrace for a while more.

Eventually, Clarke disentangled herself and looked up at him with bloodshot eyes. "I never imagined it would be this hard," she said quietly.

"What, travelling across the galaxy to a new planet with new customs?" Bellamy smiled, trying at normalcy with sarcasm.

"No. This. Us. It used to be simple," she glanced down at where he was still gripping her hip. "Now, everything is different. Sometimes I wish we were back at the dropship, or even back in Arkadia. I could deal with all the bullshit again, if it meant we could…" she trailed off, dropping her eyes.

Bellamy flexed his hand on her hip in surprise. Slowly, he reached down and dropped a kiss on her forehead. Clarke sighed, and he felt his chest flutter. "When Maddie burst through the trees and told us you were alive was the best moment of my life," he whispered. They both let out shaky breathes, until finally Clarke pulled back.

"I think we should get some sleep. I'll see you in the morning?" Bellamy nodded, and they headed back up the stairs. Bellamy stopped at the first landing, while Clarke continued up to the higher floor. They paused on the stairs.

"Goodnight, Bell," she said softly.

"See you in the morning, Princess."


End file.
